Sunday, July 12, 2009

Overwhelmed

Do you ever have those moments when you feel so overwhelmed you feel paralyzed? I had one of those this evening. I get them every once in a while. I know they will pass and somehow I will get through things but in the moment I just feel totally unable to even begin all the work in front of me.

Tonight, with the baby finally taking a nap, I looked around my dirty house while thoughts of the thousand things I need to do were nagging at my mind and in my overwhelmed state of mind I laid down and fell asleep. It was only a 20 minute nap. The children needed mom for this or that so my nap could not last long. But when I woke the kitchen was clean. Bless my husband!

This is one of those parts of motherhood you never fully understand until you live it. It is the part where you haven't slept for a stretch lasting longer than 3 hours in months and the stress of house, a high maintenance baby who requires near constant holding, school, lessons, birthday parties, bills, menu planning, teeth brushing, doctor appointments, thank you note writing, child obedience training, finding lost things, etc... all come crashing around in your consciousness and completely take you down. That was me ... tonight.

At least I have been there often enough to know it won't last and somehow the lessons will be taught, the house will get clean, the birthday party will "come to pass," food will get eaten, teeth will get brushed, and somehow some day sleep will one day last longer than 3 hours and the baby will be happy to sit and play with a toy on his own ... someday.

Our "summer" is over as the kids head back to school tomorrow. I will miss their help. I will miss them. But the return of routine will be welcome to me.

And NOW that I have spent my "alone time" minutes here with you I think I will go head to bed for my 2 hour stint of sleep. :)

19 comments:

The Robinson's said...

I too have those moments. Ugh... But in the end they are all worth it.

May you get plenty of sleep tonight or at least in the near future.

Sweet dreams.......

Anonymous said...

I love how you added "thank you note writing"! I always have on my mind someone I need to send one to and then all those other things take over and then a month or 2 pass and I realize that I did not actually get that note sent. Or did I? I get very confused when I am overwhelmed!

Thanks for the post- it's nice to know someone else feels the same sometimes!

~Laura Allen

Susy said...

As I say to my little girl....Night night my little Buttercup....

Anonymous said...

I SO remember the sleep deprivation. I would finally get the baby to sleep, and then scoot around and do a couple of things before I went to bed....and lo and behold the baby wakes just as you are drifting off to sleep.

I don't envy you that. But it does pass. Eventually.

I have to say though, I reckon I am still recovering from sleep deprivation, and mine have been fantastic sleepers for about 5 years now!!!

Love,

Jane

Bacardi Mama said...

Did you really say child obedience training? What is that?

Rach said...

I get it. I hope everything calms down today.

HUGS

Julie said...

I totally understand this post. I look around and know that with a husband on active duty nothing will get done without me. UGH- what a feeling! My kids are out of school now and we are in Ohio till mid August- enjoy your summer.

Sarah S. said...

Hang in there Steph- I have been there too. I can't remember how many times I just broke down and cried. It felt very lonely; especially late at night when everyone was going to bed and I was still up with a baby who thought it was morning time. About the party... accept the help that is being sent your way- give me a list. I am off this week. I can do your shopping or something for you! Think about it.
I hope today is better for you. I was wondering, too, what is child obedience training? I know I could use a tutorial in that area!

Anonymous said...

So well put. I've felt this way many times and you expressed it perfectly. Like you said, these times pass and remembering that is the best way to make it through them! Thank you for putting this into words that so many of us can relate to. You continue to be an inspiration.

Stephanie said...

"Child Obedience Training"

This is the term I came up with last night for the seemingly constant and unending task in which I am engaged in trying to train my children to be obedient and to be so the FIRST time I ask instead of the 5th and with counting.

If I had the answer in how to do this maybe I wouldn't still be working on it daily. :) But we are engaged in the task and it is less frustrating if I think about it as "training." Nobody is perfect in training but hopefully the training will help them be perfect in the future when it really matters. And hopefully I will find the training techniques that are most effective for each individual child because they are all different right?

Good luck to us all in this "training" exercise we call parenthood.

Love,
Stephanie

Samantha said...

I think that every Mom has those moments where we are completely overwhelmed. It's the sleep deprivation that always does you in. When my youngest was an infant(well actually right up until he stopped nursing at 13 months if we're being honest here) he woke every 11/2 hours at night. Nothing worked and believe me I tried EVERYTHING. I wasn't a new mom so I knew a few tricks of the trade but he was stubborn and always outlasted me, or maybe he really was hungry...I'm happy to say that those days are behind me and my now almost 4 yo sleeps a lovely 11-13 hours per night. I never thought it would happen but your right it always works it way out. I hope you had a peaceful night. I can't believe your kids are back to school. Living in Canada it is a little different the kids are off from the last week in June and they go back in the last week of August. These of course beening our hottest months. O.k. sorry for the mini novel. Have a wonderful, peaceful day.

Anonymous said...

I like your "obedience training" term; things eventually get done, but very rarely the 1st time the kids are asked. I too am looking forward to a schedule, but I really miss Kelsey now that she is in school and I will feel the same about Riley this afternoon. Life is crazy and feelings are eratic at times, but it all comes together and we some how get through it. Hang in there and know that you are thought of.

Nikki K.

Christina said...

Right there with ya. My hubby works 6 days a week, and gets home between 10 and 11 on all but one of those days. So we see him on Friday evenings, and Sundays (which seem like are mostly spent at church, getting ready for church, or figuring out what to eat after church, LOL!)...and I constantly feel like I am balancing the entire world on my shoulders. I don't have a *baby* anymore (youngest just turned 3) but I still don't sleep much. Huge hugs!! I read this and realized, none of us are really alone, we're all in this together :) And don't forget the role that hormones can play in the breakdown days!!!!

More hugs, Christina

Heather & Greg said...

I can totally relate. I hope you are feeling better today :)

Kristen said...

We are newly emerging from the sleepless nights. It's amazing what more than 3 hours can do for you. Here's to hoping that Noble gives you some extra minutes sooner than later. Hope the girls have a great first day back at school. I am sure being a very experience mother you have considered this but I just thought I would throw it out there, I used my wrap or sling all.the.time to get through activities hands free, it has saved me a lot of time. Hope you are having a great day!

Bacardi Mama said...

Thanks for the definition. That is something we all do. It just sounded like a class of some kind.

Anonymous said...

i know it can all be overwhelming at moments, we all know that feeling. but take time to just let the "things" go and enjoy that baby. he may be "high maintenance" but he will be content and big one day and all these hectic days will be gone and you might wish you culd just hold him again.

Jen said...

Wow, you made me feel so much better; sometimes as wives and mothers we feel like we are the only ones going through things like this!

My Army Brats and Me said...

Overwhelmed hmmm a yah! I think we all feel it here and there. Active duty soldier for a husband 3 very busy girls and a mommy battling cancer. Sometimes .... I just need to slow down:) I hope you get some much needed rest and take care.