Tuesday, April 28, 2009

On the Same Page

I love my doctor. She is so willing to follow my wishes and make the birth of this baby on my time table (or my body's) and not hers. Today I took in a "birth plan" I wrote up a while back. Normally I am not such a believer in "birth plans" because labor and delivery can be so unpredictable and really so much has to be decided during the process.

But I really wanted everyone who attends to me during this labor and delivery to be aware of my story. I want them to know that the last time I was in the hospital I was saying goodbye to a child. I am not sure how or if my grief will play into this birth. I have come to realize how unpredictable grief can be. Times I think I should be a disaster I feel strong and other times I am hit with a wave for no apparent reason.

So I wrote up my story for those who attend to me to read. I have a hard time telling people without losing it. There just isn't an easy way to tell people you had a child die. I included a bullet pointed list of things I know I do or don't want during the labor. 

I shared this "plan" of sorts with my doctor. She already knew about Camille. She was fully supportive of everything I wrote and put the plan at the top of my chart so it would be the first thing people would see. I love it.

Also, I told her I couldn't have the baby this week because of the talent show. She was totally helpful and told me to come back Monday to have my cervix checked then. She didn't want to accidently disturb things and get me started. I feel pretty confident that I can make it through Friday without going into labor now. After that, I think I will be ready to play ball whenever little Noble decides the time is right.

17 comments:

Alisha said...

This is such an exciting time for you....congrats and good luck!

Susy said...

Yeah a baby is on the way.....Soon!

Amanda said...

That is such a wonderful idea and I think that it'll really help all the nurses and Dr's able to tend you better. It's so wonderful that your Dr has been so great in following your wishes.

I'm sending cervix blocking thoughts your way ;).

Randi said...

Good luck with everything Stephanie. I'll keep my fingers crossed that you'll make it passed Friday. You have to anyway, cuz I voted for the 5th.

And I am really loving the name Noble.

Jennie said...

Wow! Good luck in waiting until next week. (Preferably the 7th!)
:) I'm glad that you have a doctor who will listen to you and your wishes. I can only imagine the bitter sweet time you will have giving birth to little Noble. It will be so beautiful, and yet I am sure difficult for you at the same time. Good for you for being proactive in your delivery! I can't wait to hear the details. I am praying for you.

Rachel said...

That's great that your doctor is so understanding. My OB was the same way. I was 6 months with Sophie when we lost Emma and he had lost a child as well so he understood. He let me call the shots on everything and was very nurturing and gave us a ton of extra attention to make sure we felt comfortable.

Mary said...

I am praying that your delivery goes smoothly and that Noble holds out for the talent show! :)

Chelsa said...

i'm so glad that your doc. is so supportive! can't wait to "meet" little noble!

Anonymous said...

You are on top of things! I think it is good that you have your story and plan for everyone involved to see. Like you said, this delivery will be wonderful, but may include some sorrow, as well (bitter-sweet experience). I am so excited for you, though. Is there anything in particular that you need for Noble; the girls and I are planning on getting you something for sure?!

Nikki K.

Davis family said...

wow. you are amazing. You have such a beautiful spirit about you.

Mimi's Toes said...

Oh, I got my question answered about your baby's name. I really like his name. Makes me think of Strong & Wise man. Very smart to have a birth plan.

Heidi said...

I'm so glad she was so supportive. I hope all goes well and I think Noble is a great name.

Julie said...

Steph,

I know this is off topic... and believe me I could talk about babies all day... : )

But, what is the LDS church recommending as far as preparedness with this whole swine flu scare?

It's OK if you don't have an answer but I thought I would ask...

Hope you are feeling well!

Stephanie said...

Julie,
The LDS church has not come out with any SPECIFIC recommendation for preparedness for "Swine Flu." The preparedness guidelines are more broad and for any emergency.

You can check out lots of information on the what the LDS church recommends to be ready for emergencies of any kind by going to www.providentliving.org.

I think personally that I will be washing my hands far more than normal.

Love,
Stephanie

Darleen said...

I can't believe the time is already here! And you are dilated to a 3! Wa-hoo! Glad you did the birth plan.

James and Sarah Narramore said...

You are SOOO much more patient then I ever was; when I was remotely close to my due date I was trying everything to have my baby. I even mixed castor oil in my eggs; which I will never again eat because of it. ha That is awesome you did a birth plan. Someone once told me that the veil is thinner when you are giving birth. So I really think that your sweet Camille will be with you! Good luck with your delivery and can't wait to see pictures of your little boy!

Jan S said...

Wow- what a brilliant and heartfelt idea to write out your story for those attending to you that day!! Truly, that is such a remarkable idea and so kind to let others know how to best help you during your labor! (And most importantly, so kind to yourself and your family!!)

I know this is probably not the best time to ask, but have you ever thought of possibly writing a book at some point- maybe in several years when you're kids are not so small- on how you dealt with the loss of Camille and how others (LDS OR non-LDS) can get through such a horrible event? Certainly even a collection of your blogs would work! I just think you have an amazing gift in your writing that would be SO helpful to other parents who have lost a child. (Or even people like me, who have not lost a child, but who have/are going through very difficult personal trials!)

Anyway, just an idea! Sorry to bring it up and add to your thoughts of "things to do." But I'm worried I'll forget if I don't mention it now :)

My prayers are with you and your family, Stephanie! I know the birth will be great, with whatever "plan" you follow!!