Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Are We There Yet?

Remember road trips? We have done a few of those in the last month. Inevitably our kids ask within the first 30 minutes the all too famous question, "Are we there yet?"

This happened on our last trip to California. Lauren asked this about 20 minutes into our 5 hour drive. I thought to myself how different a child's perception is of time. Lauren knows that her cousin Charlotte's house is far away. So after 20 minutes, she figured it had been a long time and surely we must be close.

Near the end of our trip, in what was not the middle of the night, Lauren was tired of driving. She does not sleep well in the car and it was near 11 p.m. She was just tired. Finally, about 20 miles from our destination, Lauren said, "Mom, this is too long. I want to go to bed. Let's just go home. It is too far to Charby's house."

I had a pretty vivid dream the other night about living in California and trying to get home from an outing. But the freeways were shut down and there was rioting in the streets. There was an enormous mushroom shaped cloud of smoke the size of a city over the city across the bay from where I was. It felt like the end of world. 

I woke up thinking I better get my 72 hour emergency kit updated for kids clothes and put it in my car, just in case I am somewhere I can't get home when a disaster strikes. The more I have thought about this dream, the more I have found myself asking, "Are we there yet? Is it time for the second coming yet?" 

Sometimes, I feel just like Lauren in those first minutes. It has been a long time, we must be near. The world is so wicked, we must be close. But then maybe we are only 20 minutes into this 5 hour ride. I hope not. I hope we are closer. Somehow I think whenever that day comes, whoever is alive to see it will feel like Lauren did late that night. "I am tired. I am ready to rest. Let's just go home." The real trick will be enduring then. 

Maybe that is why the Lord gives us so many personal 11th hour trials. You know the ones where you are praying to help and help doesn't come till the last second possible when it seems like all is lost. Maybe he is building our endurance so that in that time before His coming we will be able to hold on a little long and wait for the peace that only He will be able to usher in.

25 comments:

Rosemary said...

Wow. I can't tell you enough how glad I am that I decided to come on here and read that tonight. Just like the country music songs says, "Some of the Lord's greatest gift's are unanswered prayers."
It is so true and I often question why I ask and don't receive or I am let down by what is occuring. But I now realize a little more that He is with me in everything and I should just have trust in the Lord. I would also like to say.. Congratulations on being pregnant! I'm happy for you!

Dan said...

This hits home to me. Thank you.

Camille said...

This is an excellent post!! You are an amazing writer and have such a profound way of explaining things! I am Lauren......WHEN ARE WE THERE?? But yet, I know I am not fully prepared, so I hope that I too am being prepared to hang on just a little longer!
Thank you for your inspiring words!

Jennie said...

Wow! That was so thought provoking. I think you are right, He must be preparing us for endurance. Thank you for this post.

Carolyn said...

whoa, you totally read my mind and put it into words! Good post Steph.

Sarah Anne said...

I needed this. It helps to have perspective when life gets mundane or 'too hard'. I really appreciate all of your soulful and spiritual entries. Thank you. I am going to try my hardest to endure.

Kelsi said...

I love all your posts! Congratulations on your news! You might think I am wierd but I had a feeling that you might announce that you were expecting! Maybe I was just hopeful for you and your family! I wish you the very best! I hope you start feeling better soon! What a blessing! Lots of love, Kelsi

Heidi said...

Oh, that was great. And so true. Are we just beginning? Or are we almost there? I also hope we're almost there, because it scares me to think this is only the beginning. What a wonderful test this is to trust God and not fear.

2thfairy said...

Hi Steph,
I know what you are feeling here...I have had several dreams lately that have given me those same types of thoughts. Did you read "The Great & The Terrible" Series yet? It will also leave you with that same feeling.
Jan

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Sharron said...

Another reason to embrace the the opportunities that challenges bring to us. It was such a relief when I was able to finally look back to our hard times and feeling a little twinge that I missed them. Not the losses really, but the closeness that we developed with each other and Heavenly Father.

Rachel said...

I've so often noticed this same analogy, thanks for putting it into such articulate words. So often as I'm counseling my children on patience and being grateful for what they have, that little voice in my heart gently reminds me that I need to work on the same things.

a.k.a. Jack said...

I love this post, Stephanie. Sometimes I think, half jokingly--half serious, "I'm not sure I want to live for eternity--it just sounds exhausting." This gave me an interesting perspective. I love to think about how Heavenly Father prepares us and comparing our understanding to that of children in the eternal grand scheme of things. Anyway, I enjoyed this post. Hope the nausea eases up ALOT for you SOON. :)
Love Ya,
Jenny

Melinda said...

You are such a great writer. This is a fantastic post. I agree with your last statement. I think we are all learning some amazing lessons that will help us hold on in the last days until the moment we stand before our Savior. Thanks

Shawn, Hayley and Jack said...

I don't know you, and it is a really round about way that I came across your blog but... You are really inspirational to me and I hope you don't mind me reading your blog every once in awhile.

Thanks for sharing your stories and helping me. I really admire you and your happiness in what you have been faced with.

Tiffany said...

Stephanie I do not know you, nor do you know me. A friend of mine sent me your link and I keep finding myself waiting in anticipation for what you will write next. Thank you so much for your candid thoughts and testimony! I truly believe you are an "angel among us" sent to teach us all patience, endurance and FAITH. Thanks for letting so many people draw from your strength. I hope you have a healthy and wonderful pregnancy.
Much love to your beautiful family, The Sanders Family

Natalie said...

Thank you for your blog. I had a rough day being a mother and now I feel like I can face another day. Your blog is a great inspiration and I'm grateful that you will share things that are obviously so close to your heart.

Anonymous said...

As a mother of 4 girls myself, I often feel the "are we there yet?" feeling. Thank you for putting it such a wonderful way. You are so gifted with "words", it truly amazes me how you see the Lords hand in all things. Such a good example for me, thank you!

The Heizzys said...

Stephanie, My name is Lara Heiselbetz, I attended your wards Trunk or Treat with a couple of our friends last night. I wanted so badly to approach you and tell you hi and that I am truly an avid reader of your blog. I have followed your story and your healing process since losing your precious Camille. You are always in my prayers. Last night when I saw you I felt like I was seeing a celebrity because I have been so interested in your story. I am sorry I wasn't brave enough to say hi last night, just know I think you are amazing and I pray everyday that the Lord brings your family comfort. Congratulations on the pregnancy. May you be blessed. If you can't remember me please visit my blog heizzyfam.blogspot.com. Oh and I loved this post, amazing as always!

Lara H.

Aprilyn said...

I never thought of it that way. Thanks for sharing.

kathryn o said...

I remember the conversation we had about this when we went to SYTYCD...I really like this analogy to sum up your feelings. The good news is that whether we are sort of close or still far at least we are on the journey! It's a destination worth waiting for!
Loves to you!!!

Nate and Jessica said...

Very insightful. Thank you!

Ruthie said...

I know how you feel, I often want to ask, "Are we nearly there yet?" I really hope so. One thing I learned as an adult that I find refreshing is that I don't have to have reached perfection by then. None of us will have. As a child I really thought I had to be perfect before I died in order to make it back to Heavenly Father. I didn't realise then how hard it would be. There's a beautiful song that expresses how I feel about the Saviour coming again which was published in The Ensign a couple of years ago - the words and music are lovely. I've written parts for it and our small ward choir is learning it right now. I'm afraid it's only available as a pdf and not a sound file, though I could email you one if you'd like to hear it. A link for the words and music are below.

http://www.lds.org/churchmagazines/2003/Dec2003Ensign.pdf#page=14

& Congratulations on your pregnancy. I'm so happy for you. Hope all goes well

Love Ruth

Susy said...

Thank you for that last paragraph. I needed that...May I share something that I think speaks volumes. Yesterday a gal in my ward at sacrament said "We experience joy during our tribulations" This is because we may not know why we going through what we may be going through...But we have the gospel and that is our joy!

Angela said...

Hello Stephanie! I dont personally know you although reading your blog everday I feel as though I do! I have commented once before about a similar dream we shared. Anyhow I wanted to say I am so extremely happy for you and your family for your soon addition to your family, what a great joy that will be, and also knowing that Camille is with him/her now telling the little one all about the wonderful family theyre about to join! What a blessing!
Also, I loved your post, and I very often wonder the same things! Especially recenty in light of General Conference, recent Political Events and so on, just make it more fresh in my mind. Part of me hopes its not too soon, I have much to get ready for, and other parts of me wishes it would just come already! I love all your posts and hope for you and your family contiued comfort, and many many blessings! I hope you feel much better soon, and thankyou so much for just being you!